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Oct. 11th, 2005



Two stories from the above. The first, while no “Squirrels On Crack”, is still pretty good in its own right, while the second is reported in a gleeful tabloid manner that makes the Sun look positively sluggish.


COURT PUMPED UP FOR EX-JUDGE’S SEX-TOY TRIAL

Jurors in the case of a former judge accused of repeatedly exposing himself in his Oklahoma courtroom will be allowed to see a sex toy central to the allegations and to hear testimony about a second “penis pump” discovered under the judge’s bench, a court has ruled.

Ex-District Court judge Donald Thompson, 58, spent over 20 years on the bench before stepping down over a year ago. Prosecutors allege that he masturbated with a penis pump while presiding over two murder trials and a civil trial in 2003. He denies that and says the seized pump was just a gag gift from a friend.

Defense attorney Clark Brewster had asked Judge C. Allen McCall to suppress the pump because it didn’t work – and was sawed in half while in state custody. Prosecutor Pattye High said a state chemist dissected it to swab it for DNA traces.

The judge also rejected a motion to prevent testimony from a court reporter who claims to have found the second penis pump under the judge’s bench in 2001. Brewster had argued there was no evidence to link that pump to his client.

McCall did take under advisement other issues – including whether to allow the admission of 180 hours of courtroom tapes that prosecutors claim contain the whooshing sound of the penis pump in use.

Another potential piece of evidence is a photo that prosecutors say would help a witness identify Thompson’s penis.

If convicted, Thompson could face up to 10 years in prison and a $20,000 fine on each of three indecent-exposure charges, and would have to register as a sex offender.

The ex-judge's photo is captioned “Donald Thompson: Defense deflated”





FOXY BROWN IN ‘DEAF’ JAM

Dabbing tears from her false eyelashes, rapper Foxy Brown said yesterday she will stop performing indefinitely due to upcoming surgery for an unspecified hearing defect.

Foxy – whose real name is Inga Marchand – gave no details of her ailment, treatment or prognosis.

“It took a lot of courage to come forward,” Brown said, straining to hear reporters’ questions. “I read my Web sites every day, and I know everyone’s praying for me.”

The emotional revelation came as Brown, 25, left Manhattan Criminal Court, where she’s on the hook for allegedly whacking two Chelsea manicurists with her fists and her cellphone during a dispute over the bill at Bloomie Nails.

The ravishing rap roughhouser – who came to court swathed in Louis Vuitton and left in a Mercedes convertible – is charged with misdemeanor assault for that August 2004 manicure mayhem.

Comments

( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
strictlytrue
Oct. 11th, 2005 10:29 pm (UTC)
"Ravishing rap roughhouser" - that's beautiful. Like that line in Ghostbusters about the boys in grey battling it out with a pretty pesky poltergeist. Say what you like about New Yorkers - they've got moxy.

BTW - meant to post this during the whole squirrel-crackgate affair:

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
ex_cornfedpi814
Oct. 12th, 2005 11:55 am (UTC)
Aaargh! Will people PLEASE stop putting the suffix 'gate' on the end of a word when they wish to imply some sort of scandal. It drives me mad.
(Anonymous)
Oct. 12th, 2005 03:01 pm (UTC)
When people want to show they're aggravated about something, will they please all stop beginning their rants with "Aaargh!"!

Y'all will be hearing more of teh Aaarghgates, youse mark my words.
ex_cornfedpi814
Oct. 12th, 2005 03:01 pm (UTC)
Sorry. No gates, no aaarghs.
(Anonymous)
Oct. 12th, 2005 03:30 pm (UTC)
Tuesday - officially the day for getting wound up about absolutely fucking nothing (http://www.livejournal.com/users/setting_sun/191344.html).
ex_cornfedpi814
Oct. 12th, 2005 03:31 pm (UTC)
It's Wednesday.
(Anonymous)
Oct. 12th, 2005 04:04 pm (UTC)
See?!
strictlytrue
Oct. 12th, 2005 04:53 pm (UTC)
Actually, I completely agree with cornfedpig about the use of the suffix "-gate". I hate it. It doesn't even make any sense - I mean, the Watergate scandal was named after a hotel. It's not as if Nixon had been involved in stealing gallons of the water supply, or flouting a hosepipe ban.

I did use it above however, and only do use it when the context is utterly ridiculous - i.e. squirrels on crack - to show just how stupid it looks.
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )

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