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Don’t have nightmares

As is often the way with wild surmising, my wild surmising the other day was way off the mark. My downstairs neighbour was not removed from the premises in a police van; what I happened to catch sight of was the uniformed driver helping a colleague climb in the back and closing the door behind him. My neighbour wasn’t even arrested, in the event, as he willingly co-operated.

“I went outside to talk to the workmen,” he told me. “They’d parked their bloody great vans on the pavement, four of them, and two cars. You could hardly get to the front door. I went and had a word with them—I’d had a bit to drink—and they got stroppy. One of them told me to fuck off. So I went inside, came back and threw a bucket of water over them.”

Three cars, a van, at least eight officers—for a bucket of water. “That sounds right,” said a police source. “At one in the morning, those officers will have had absolutely nothing to do. The call’s come in, a load of them will have thought, ‘There could be a fight... I’ll have some of that’, and they’ve all hurried round to yours.”

Best thing is that, for the rest of the night in question and the next, the tube workers crammed their several vans into the Underground station car park, where they all just about fit, but getting them all in and out must have been a logistical nightmare. If a bucket of water (with a consequent slap on the wrist) is all it has taken to persuade them to sod off from our bit of pavement, my downstairs neighbour may turn out to be something of a—yes, admittedly wayward and pissed—hero.

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Comments

( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
lebeautemps
Jan. 22nd, 2007 12:26 pm (UTC)
Sounds like Tiswas round at yours....foamy custard pies next.
offensive_mango
Feb. 5th, 2007 11:51 am (UTC)
Yes he was! They've got their own carpark? Well ffs. Damn right he was a hero.
offensive_mango
Feb. 5th, 2007 11:52 am (UTC)
Oh, you know, I should learn to comment two seconds later, when I realize that [x item] (for example, underground car park) isn't exactly what I assume.
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )

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