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I have water on the knee, which I haven't had since I was a boy. Walking is okay, but going up or down stairs hurts like a prize bastard, which is unfortunate at a time when I have cut out the lift at work altogether. Idle research on the net produced an unsettling consensus of osteoarthritis, which, predictably, it isn't at all. I'm only 33, for God's sake. According to the doctor I have somehow strained my knee—possibly during the c*nt-off (qv)—rather than it being, for example, gout. She has given me some powerful anti-inflammatories and a load of codeine. "That stuff's blinding if you mix it with alcohol," she said as she handed it to me. I looked up at her. "I was joking," she said.

(In conversation she told me she had learnt to ski from a Swiss German woman with a heavy accent. She has ever after remembered the earnest instruction that "when you want to stop, make a wee".)

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pvcdiva
Jun. 28th, 2006 06:19 pm (UTC)
one of my fellow managers at the IMAx had gout...due mostly to his terrible diet of McDonalds breakfasts and salt and vinegar crisps...it's unbelievably painful...we had to push him about on an office chair to get him downstairs. Resisted the urge to have wheely races around the office as he was already near in tears with the pain
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